Wednesday, August 14, 2013

Why Wait?

I have never, never, seriously never  met an adult who was glad they had sex with a lot of people.

Now, don't get me wrong, I have heard people boast about how many people they have f*d, but these are young folks.

They are in the midst of their mistakes.

When they are older, these are the same folks who wish they had never started such things.

Certainly not boasted about it.

Whenever someone, an adult, has had sex before marriage and opened up to me about how they feel about it, they have always shared regret.

They often share how empty it was.

How they felt and still feel dirty, even used.

They wish they had waited.

Thy wish they could have shared that specialness with their current partner/spouse.

Now, I am not just talking about those "Christian dogooders". No, I am talking about atheists, Muslims, Jews, and all the rest.

It's not just a faith or religion thing.

It's a heart thing.

Deep in the heart of humans is this deep desire to feel special, cherished and prized. Sharing oneself sexually out of a commitment steals from this goal.

The grass is always greener on the other side.

It looks satisfying. It looks fun.

Glamerous.

Maybe it even looks like you are a champion of the catch.

Thank you MTV, music, movies, and magazines. Yes, the web too.

The media portrays a lie that sex before or outside of commitment looks like it feels great, sounds like it will almost fill the gap in desire.

Afterall, don't they all look happy?

Sadly, what you don't see is the heart of these people later on. 

The real deal about all that free for all sex is that it is like eating pixi stix when you could wait for your six course filet mignon prepared by Wolfgang Puck.

Or, maybe you were the snack.

In hind sight, this is regretful to say the least.

"How could I have been so stupid?" they ask. Or, you ask.

The problem is impatience.

Mankind is famous for it.

We are generally too darn impatient to hold out for the satisfying and settle for the snack.

The quick fix.

The regret.

After all, we can clean up the mess later.

Really? How?

But, its hard to tell someone this unless they have been there and done that.

Regret is hard to explain.

This is especially true if you are trying to explain this to young folks who surely know better than their elders. After all, it won't happen to them. They are different...

But, though they may be different that night, they won't necessarily feel special in the morning.

Or cherished over the long term.

Not if they are just one of someone's many pixi stix.

Maybe someday there will be a way for folks to get a glimpse of their future "what if" consequence beforehand.

Till then, maybe more "old folks"- more of the been there done that adults could be open and humble.

Maybe they could share their experience- the regret.

Maybe they could reach just one young person.

Maybe you could.



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